Can't Help Falling in Love (With You)
by mishasbabyminion
Summary: Emma and Killian have been friends, best friends, for years and would do absolutely anything for each other. Even go to a wedding just to make sure that the other isn't left alone to "lose the relationship" in the eyes of their ex.
1. December 8

_Hey all! If you have read my one shot_ That's The Way I Loved You _this will look extremely familiar to you. I decided that I wasn't happy with the way I had written it, and rather than just going through and editing that work, I wanted to do an almost complete rewrite and make it a multi-chapter. I'm hoping that this one gets the same amount of response that the original did._

 _Make sure to leave a review if you liked this! They feed the muse!_

 ***** December 8** **th** *******

Emma stretched lazily in her bed, not wanting to move from her mountains of pillows and blankets to face the cold, December morning. It had been an unusually late night for her; while she went out drinking with Ruby, Belle, and Elsa often, she never stayed out past eleven. Last night, though, as it was getting on in the evening, she had received a text message from Killian that worried her.

She was used to long, drawn out messages that were written in perfect, grammatically correct sentences from him. Instead, she had gotten a message filled with jumbled letters and random emoticons. She was used to this sort of thing from Ruby – it happened more times than she could really count – but she had very rarely received a text like this from her best friend of almost ten years.

She had left the bar (making her goodbyes quick to the girls and telling them that she would buy the first two rounds on their next night out because she had to bail) and made her way over to Killian's apartment, knowing that she would probably end up being there a while.

 _She let herself in; they had exchanged keys years ago in case one of them had an emergency and needed the other, and it had turned into them just dropping by for the hell of it and drinking all of the alcohol the other had in store._

 _This is how Emma found Killian when she walked into his living room._

" _Swan," he had said as he looked up at her with big basset hound eyes. "'m glad you could make it, love."_

" _What's going on, Killian?" she asked, plopping down into the seat next to him. "What has you drunker than a pirate on a bender? This isn't like you."_

" _Have I mentioned how lovely you are?" Though his face held that same hang-dog expression, he reached out to tousle the curls that rested over her right shoulder. "So… blonde and curly."_

" _Seriously, Killian," she urged as she grabbed his hand and held it firmly between her own. "What's going on with you tonight?"_

" _Milah," he grunted out. He reached for an envelope on the coffee table, and the bottle of rum that was sitting beside it. The rum was already uncapped; he took a generous swig and offered the bottle to her, which she accepted gladly._

" _What about Milah?" she asked, setting the rum back on the table. "You haven't talked to her since you guys broke up, right?"_

 _He pressed the envelope into her chest without speaking and grabbed for the rum again. He took several gulps before she pried it out of his hands, took another drink, and looked through the contents of the envelope._

 _A wedding invitation. Killian's ex-girlfriend had sent him an invitation to her upcoming wedding._

 _Unfortunately, that wasn't even the worst part of the situation. Killian and Milah had only been separated for six months, and the wedding was set in March - only three months away. Nine months after their breakup, not only was Milah in a new, committed relationship, she was getting married._

 _Emma looked up at her best friend, sadness clouding her eyes. It was her expression, she thought, that made Killian finally break down and show the emotions he had been holding back about Milah for so long. It broke her own heart to see Killian crying like this, so she did what came natural and pulled him into her chest, just like she did with her son every time he was upset._

 _Emma sat and rocked Killian gently back and forth until his sobs had somewhat subsided, then she reached out for the half-filled bottle of rum and took a big drink before offering it back to him._

" _Do you want to talk about it?" she asked, Killian still held tightly to her chest._

" _Not particularly-" he took a swig from the bottle and passed it back to her "- but… Swan, do you think she was cheating on me with someone else? That the reason behind her sudden marriage is because it wasn't so sudden after all?"_

 _Emma took a minute to consider her answer. "Maybe she's pregnant," she finally forced out with an unconvincing laugh. It came up short when it wasn't returned, and she quickly backtracked. "All joking aside, Killian, I don't have a great answer for you."_

 _He sighed and took another drink, then burying his face into her stomach._

" _Hey," she said softly, running her hand through his hair. "Why don't we put this off for another day and get shit faced?"_

" _I like the way you think, Swan."_

 _It was close to four in the morning when she finally got Killian settled into his bed and asleep, and she knew she was in no state to drive. Instead, knowing that she needed to get home to Henry, she called an Uber and left her keys sitting on the kitchen counter for Killian to use the next day._

 _She had a few minutes to kill in between calling the Uber and grabbing her things, so she went back into Killian's room to make sure that he was laying on his side (just in case he were to get sick in the middle of the night; she wouldn't want him to choke on his own vomit) and found herself drawn to how innocent he looked sleeping._

 _She would never understand how Milah could be so ungrateful._

 _Emma stepped forward and pulled Killian's blanket snugly around his shoulders, just as she would do for her son, and pressed a kiss to his forehead._

" _I love you," she said softly. She heard the ping on her phone signaling that her ride had arrived, and left the room without a backwards glance._

It was almost ten in the morning when Emma roused herself enough from her pillows to check her alarm clock. She didn't usually like to sleep this late on the weekends because of Henry, but she was glad that he had let her sleep. Her head was pounding from the night before and her mouth tasted like someone had shoved fresh-picked cotton into it.

 _Maybe Henry and I should go have a greasy breakfast this morning_ , she thought.

A knock sounded on her bedroom door before she had the chance to get up and make herself feel halfway decent.

"Mom?" Henry called through the wood. "Killian's here and he looks kind of upset. Is it okay if I turn on the stove and make some hot chocolate?"

Emma smiled; her son was so thoughtful. "Yeah, kid," she called back. "Just let me get dressed and I'll be out in a minute."

Her thirteen year old knew that Killian was more to her than just a friend. In fact, Henry might be the only one who knew precisely how she felt about her best friend.

Killian was around for every illness, baseball game, bad grade, scraped knee, and movie night that Emma and Henry have had since he was three years old. The only people who had been in Henry's life more often were her parents, and Mary Margaret and David Nolan weren't nearly as cool in Henry's eyes half of the time – they didn't let him stay up late and eat ice cream for dinner, but Killian did. Killian had become the father figure that Henry _deserved_ , effectively replacing the man that Emma never intended for Henry to meet. Only Killian knew the whole story as to why Emma didn't want Neal anywhere near her and her son; he had abandoned her after he found out she was pregnant and had accused her of stealing money from him _to the police_ as some sort of petty revenge for accidentally getting pregnant in the first place. It broke her heart, but had made her strong and had given her son to her. And eventually, it led her to Killian.

Emma pulled herself from the comfort of the nest that was her bed, stretching and popping the tightened joints in her back. She pulled on her robe and tied it loosely over her tank top and pajama bottoms, too lazy to find a more suitable outfit, and pulled her hair into a messy knot at the top of her head. She quickly went through her morning routine in the bathroom, trying to rid herself of the cottony feeling that last night had left her with. Feeling slightly better, Emma rolled her shoulders back and went out to greet the day.

She walked out of her room and was greeted by the sight of her son and Killian fighting over a spatula when she walked into the kitchen. Fighting her grin, she snuck in behind Killian before jumping at his back, yelling "boo!"

"Bloody hell, Swan!" he cursed, startled into dropping the spatula on the floor.

Henry laughed uproariously.

Emma wrapped her arms around Killian's waist, burying her face in his shoulders and breathing in his scent. "I'm sorry," she said, fighting the laugh that was threatening to bubble up at any time.

"No you're not," Henry said with a laugh, digging around in a drawer and handing a new spatula to Killian. "Now, can we get breakfast started? I'm _starving_."

Emma rolled her eyes and let go of Killian to start pulling the ingredients for French toast out of her fridge and pantry. She was hoping that this would be greasy enough to start the fight of her looming hangover, but decided not to take any real chances. She placed her ingredients down on the counter and walked to the cabinet where she kept her emergency supplies, first aid kit, and store of medicines, pulling out the bottle of ibuprofen. She knocked a few into her hand and passed the bottle over to Killian, knowing that he needed the medicine more than she did. Killian smiled gratefully when he took the bottle, rubbing the back of his neck with his free hand.

"We were _going_ to make pancakes, mom," Henry said with a whine.

Emma only had to look at her boys before Henry was dropping his argument, the power of the "mom stare" making him realize that the topic really was not up for discussion. "The last time you two were in charge of making pancakes, we almost had to call the fire department. So no, we're having French toast."

Killian laughed, not denying the incident. The lumps of char they had tried to pass off as pancakes had indeed caught fire, but he had managed to smother it in time. From that point on, though, Emma had restricted him to making the one food she knew he could – his famous hangover breakfast scramble, which included eggs, bacon, potatoes, peppers, and onions. He handed over the spatula to Emma with a smile on his face and moved to the fridge to get everything ready for him to make his dish.

Henry, noticing that he was going to get food with no effort on his part, left the kitchen to find their traditional Sunday morning cartoons.

This was somewhat of a tradition for the three of them, eating breakfast while curled up on the couch with mugs of hot chocolate (or black coffee, in Killian's case), plates of breakfast goodies, and the old-school cartoons that Emma and Killian had grown up with. They had started it when Killian first came into their life, and Emma just needed a break from being the sole parent. Killian would make his scramble, Emma would make French toast, pancakes, or waffles, and they would spend the day with Henry in their pajamas. It was the family Emma had always wanted - her son and the man she adored right by her side – and she was glad that the tradition had stuck.

With Henry out of earshot, Emma turned to face Killian.

"How are you feeling this morning?" she asked softly, not wanting to draw Henry's attention back to the kitchen. "Henry said that you looked upset when he woke me up this morning."

Rubbing the back of his ear, Killian sighed before answering. "I've been better, to be honest, love," he said sadly. "I spent almost two years of my life with Milah and she decided that it would be a great idea to invite me to her wedding? Not six months after she left me, which is just the cherry on top of the shit sundae."

Emma moved to his side, wrapping her arms tightly around his waist. This was one method of comfort that Emma had never felt guilty about showing Killian. When he was with Milah, she had held back any unnecessary touched because of how jealous the other woman could be, but she had always felt safe with her arms around Killian or his arms around her. It was something they had always done; when she was having a hard time being a single parent, he would hold her close and assure her that everything would be okay, and when he had a rough day with Milah or Liam or any other issue, she would return the favor and hug him as if her life depended on it.

"You know you can always not go to the wedding, Killian," she said. "Don't put yourself through more pain. She's not worth it."

"She sent an invitation to Liam as well," he said with a roll of his eyes. "And for some reason, he feels the need to go and join her on this 'happy day', so I can't just ignore the invitation like I planned on. He told me _that_ lovely piece of news this morning."

"I don't see why that means you need to go, Killian," she insisted. "Why should you go and be happy for the woman who broke your heart?"

"Because Liam would never let me live it down if I couldn't make myself sit through one simple little wedding," he said bitterly. He shut off the heat under his scramble with a violent click and turned to lean against the counter beside the stove.

"But it's your ex-girlfriend."

"Doesn't matter. It's not good form."

"Screw good form," Emma said as she pulled the sugary breakfast treat off the griddle and turned back to her best friend. "You need to do what's best for _you_. Maybe you can bring someone with you and show her that you're over her once and for all?"

"Who in the bloody hell would go with me to my ex-girlfriend's wedding, Swan?" he said grumpily. He looked up at her from his position against the counter and his eyes betrayed him, showing the hurt that Milah had caused him by having the audacity to send him that piece of cardboard. It killed Emma to see him in that much pain, and with that she made her decision.

"I would." The sincerity echoed in her words as she looked Killian in the eyes. "I wouldn't make you sit through that alone, Killian."

"Thank you, Swan," he said softly.

" _Mom! Killian!_ " Henry yelled from the living room. " _Where are we on that French toast? I'm starving, here!"_

The pair laughed and moved back to the stove to get the food and prepare plates for the three of them; leave it to Henry to lighten up the mood and get Killian to smile. Emma grabbed plates for herself and Henry, while Killian carried his own. Before they could leave the kitchen, however, he used his free hand to reach out and grab Emma's forearm.

"Swan?" he asked. "You know how much you mean to me, right?"

"Of course I do, Killian," Emma insisted. "You're my best friend – have been for years and always will be, if I have anything to say about it."

Killian smiled and let go of Emma's arm. "What would I do without you, Swan?"

"Crash and burn," Emma said teasingly.

Killian rolled his eyes and they made their way into the living room to join Henry, who had Scooby Doo playing on the television and was wrapped in Emma's favorite fluffy blanket. Emma shook her head; he always left her without her blanket, and she always ended up sharing the knitted throw that her mother had made her years ago with Killian. She handed Henry his plate and sat down next to his curled-up legs, getting comfortable so that Killian could settle in as well. Emma held out her hand for Killian's plate so that he could grab the throw before settling down.

If there was one thing Emma truly loved, it was the sense of familiarity and routine that Killian had developed with her and her son on Sunday mornings. Not for the first time, she wished that she could wake up to this kind of morning every day. She had been in love with Killian Jones for years now, but had finally admitted it to herself last winter, right in the middle of one of Killian and Milah's biggest fights. She had felt guilty at the time because Killian was dangerously in love with Milah, but now she was just afraid to admit her feelings.

Afraid that he wouldn't feel as strongly for her as she did for him.

The sounds of the Scooby gang trying to chase after their current ghost mingled with the soft sounds of chewing, and Emma felt at peace. She glanced at Henry, who was shoveling food in his mouth mindlessly, and then at Killian, who was staring right back at her with a small smile on his face.

"What?" she asked.

"You have a bit of syrup on your upper lip, love." Killian could have left it at that and let Emma wipe up her mess, but he didn't. He took his thumb and gently ran it across her lips, letting it linger for a moment at the corner before sticking it directly in his mouth.

"Ew! Killian!" Emma shrieked. "Why are you so weird?"

"Ah, you love me for it, Swan," he teased with a big grin on his face.

 _I do,_ she thought. _If only you knew how much._

"You are a child," she said instead, keeping her tone light. "I can see why you and Henry get along so well."

"Hey, don't bring me into this!" exclaimed Henry. "And breakfast was really good mom, Killian. Thank you for making it."

"You're welcome, lad," Killian replied.

The three had all cleaned their plates and set them on the coffee table in front of them, curling back into the overstuffed couch so that they could watch their Sunday cartoon marathon. Emma shamelessly pulled the throw over her lap and curled into Killian's side so that they could both enjoy the warmth. Henry looked over at Emma and shot her a knowing smirk before turning back towards the television.

Emma rolled her eyes at her son and tucked her feet up under her. Killian relaxed at her side and wrapped his arm around her loosely as he kicked his feet up onto the part of the coffee table that wasn't covered in dishes from their breakfast.

"Comfy, Swan?" he whispered the question into her hair; she could have sworn that she felt his lips graze her there, but she didn't want to get her hopes up.

"You make a good pillow," she teased. Killian laughed and tightened his hold on her, turning back to the cartoons.

It was going to be a better day than yesterday; she could already tell.


	2. December 15

***** December 15** **th** *******

 _09:37 Do you know what the dress code is for this_

 **09:40 I believe black tie. Why?**

 _09:45 Figures. Need to go get a new dress._

 **09:48 Figures?**

 _09:52 It figures that she would have a black tie wedding_

 _09:55 Fits her personality perfectly_

 _09:57 She's way too much of a drama queen, K. Maybe it's best that you 2 broke up_

 _10:15 Sorry if I made you mad_

 **10:30 It's fine, Swan.**

 _12:15 Wanna get coffee after work? I'll buy_

 **12:20 Sounds good. Four Kids?**

 _12:22 You know it!_

Emma sat waiting in the café area of Four Kids Coffee, hot chocolate in her hands and Killian's mocha sitting in front of her. The hot chocolate at Four Kids had always helped to calm her nerves when she had a rough day at work, which she had. She had been trailing a skip since five thirty that morning, and he had managed to evade her every turn she made, which meant that she would have to do things the hard way and try to find him on social media for a "date". She hated doing that – even though it almost always worked on the scum she was tailing, it made her feel cheap… and it made her feel like she was cheating on Killian, which was ridiculous.

Seeing him would put her mind at ease on the whole situation, she was sure.

She wasn't exactly sure when she became so dependent on Killian and his friendship, but she knew what she couldn't handle life without him at her side. Seeing him hurting because of Milah again was pushing her towards the edge. Sometimes, she questioned Killian's choice to be with Milah. It could have just been jealousy talking, but Emma had always thought that Milah was never fully committed to the relationship in the same way that Killian was. It seemed to her that Killian was always telling her about something that Milah had gotten upset about or that Killian was spending less and less time with his friends because Milah wasn't comfortable with him spending time with other women. It may have been petty for her to think that way, but she was secretly glad when that relationship ended because Killian was obviously unhappy; the breakup gave him the opportunity to find someone that loved him with their whole heart and wanted to see him happy.

Milah only wanted to see herself happy.

The bell over the door chimed and Emma glanced up from the cup on her hands to see her best friend walking into the coffee house, brushing snow from his shoulders as he stripped the scarf from his neck. He always looked attractive to Emma, but today it seemed to multiply tenfold. His eyes were shining and his cheeks were flushed a deep pink from the cold. She grinned when he caught her eye and waved him over to their table.

"The usual?" he questioned as he took off his coat. Emma nodded and pushed the cup to the other side of the table. "Ah, this is why I love you, Swan."

Emma's heart jumped at the words. She would never get used to him telling her that he loved her. He had always been vocal about his affection for her, and she knew that this phrase was just another in his list of compliments that he paid her. It was a fool's hope, she thought, that she would love her in the same way she loved him.

She sighed, but still smiled, as he got settled.

Killian took the seat across from her, kicking his foot up so that it landed in her lap. Emma pushed the foot off with a roll of her eyes and took another long pull of her hot chocolate.

"I'm sorry about earlier, Killian," she said quietly, not quite meeting his eyes. No matter what she felt about his ex, she hated to see him upset with her.

"It's nothing, lass." He brushed the apology off with a wave of his hand and a grin. "To be quite honest, when I got to thinking about what you said, I knew that you were right, Milah always had to be the center of attention and have a big deal made about everything. Do you remember when I brought her to the bar to celebrate winning that big case for the firm and she basically-"

"Sat in your lap the entire night, determined to suck your face off? Yeah, I remember," Emma said with a laugh. "That was the same night that Ruby got trashed and tried to hook up with Liam."

"Nothing is ever dull with that lass around, is it?" he asked, chuckling and taking a drink of his mocha. "Damn, that will always be amazing. Are you sure you don't want a drink?"

Emma shook her head at the cup he tilted her way, raising her hot chocolate in return. "Cinnamon," she said simply. "Anyway, are you sure that this wedding is going to be black tie? It makes sense because it's Milah's wedding, but I've never actually heard of someone who _wasn't_ famous throwing one."

Killian nodded. "I checked the invitation before I came here. I marked you down for chicken on the response card, by the way. I figured you wouldn't want the salmon."

Emma wrinkled her nose. "I hate fish," she grumbled, "so thanks for that. Now what am I going to wear? I'm assuming that everyone will be in tuxedos and floor length ball gowns, which I absolutely do not have."

Killian rubbed behind his ear, thinking. "What about that red dress that you wore to your parents' anniversary party in July? You looked stunning in that."

Her heart was racing; he didn't mean that in the way that she wanted, she was sure of it.

"Killian," she said with a shake of her head and a roll of her eyes, "not only is that dress knee length and looks like it belongs at someone's high school prom, but Ruby spilled vodka soda all over it and ruined the front of it. Remember?"

"Not really," he said honestly. "Milah had just broken up with me and I was pretty drunk myself."

"Sorry. I forgot about that."

"Not your fault lass. It wasn't one of my proudest moments."

"I think I was worried about keeping Henry from seeing his Aunt Ruby completely hammered."

Killian laughed, but there was still a slightly lost look on his face that broke Emma's heart.

"So what are you going to do about your dress problem?" he asked, shaking his head and turning back to his coffee.

"How do you feel about going dress shopping with me?"

 _Hey all! I hope that you're liking the rewrite so far! With this author's note, I wanted to say that Four Kids Coffee is a real place in Northeast Ohio, and their coffee is fantastic. Actually, as I am writing this, I am currently sitting in Four Kids drinking a Mint Chocolate Chai Latte, which is like heaven in a cup if you like Chai._

 _If you're ever in North Canton or Alliance, Ohio, make sure to look them up!_


	3. December 21-22

***** December 21** **st** *******

"Little brother!" Liam exclaimed.

Killian walked through the door to his brother's house with a roll of his eyes. " _Younger_ brother, Liam. You always do that."

"Ah, but you will always be my little brother, Killian," Liam teased. "To what do I owe the pleasure of you visiting my humble abode this morning?"

"Humble my arse," Killian said with a roll of his eyes. He made his way through Liam's house, flopping down on the couch and putting his feet up on the antique coffee table, just to annoy Liam. "I need to buy a house, I think."

"Why on earth would you do that?" Liam questioned. He sat down and glared at Killian's feet until his brother laughed and put them on the floor. "You have a perfectly fine apartment."

"Well, I don't have much room, now do I?"

"What the bloody hell do you need more room for, brother? Thinking about starting a family, are you?"

Killian stopped talking, choosing instead to glare at his brother.

"Ah, I've touched a bit of a nerve, have I?" Liam took a deep breath and turned so that he was fully looking at Killian. "Brother, you need to let her go."

"I _can't_ ," Killian spat. "She's all I ever think about lately, especially with this bloody wedding coming up."

"That's the whole point, Killian!" Liam argued. "You need to get over her – she's getting married! Milah is trying to extend an olive branch by inviting us to her wedding, and here you are, still bitter about losing her!"

Killian laughed sarcastically. "You think I'm in love with _her_? Maybe you're getting slow in your old age, brother. I got over her a while ago."

"Then who the hell -" Liam stopped mid-sentence and a smile grew on his face. " _Oh_! Well, I never thought you would admit _that_ , Killian."

"I'm not admitting anything," he said sharply. He took a deep breath before starting again. "Liam, I can't do anything about it. It doesn't matter what I feel for Emma, not when I know that she'll never feel the same way for me."

"Now hold on just a minute." Liam held up his hand to quiet any protest from Killian. "Why do you think that she'll never feel the same way about you?"

"Have you seen her? She's bloody fantastic, especially once you know everything she's been through in her life. She's a great mother, a fantastic bail bondswoman, and my best friend in the entire world."

"Do you hear yourself right now?"

"What do you mean?"

"How could she not feel the same way about you when you look at her like she's hung the moon and stars for only your eyes to see?"

Killian sighed and ran his hand down his face. "You don't get it, do you Liam?" he asked sadly. "She's too good for me. I could never be the man of honor that she deserves – not after the hardships she's had to face in her life."

Liam clenched his jaw. "You've got it all wrong, little brother."

"Aye? How so?"

"If one of you is truly not worthy of the other, it's her. You're the one that's too good for her."

"What the hell are you on about, Liam?" Anger laced Killian's question, and he was tempted to put his feet back up on the table just to get a piece of petty revenge against his brother, but decided against it. "Emma is by far the best, most pure soul I have ever met."

"Killian -"

"Actually, I don't think I want to hear what you have to say." Killian cut Liam off with a wave of his hand and rose from the couch. He stormed towards the door, Liam hot on his trail, and only stopped to make one final comment to his brother before he could exit.

"If you're going to insult the woman I love, you might as well be insulting me."

"I don't think going dress shopping this close to the holiday was your best idea, lass," Killian grumbled.

The streets of Boston was were bustling with last-minute shoppers – mothers tugging along screaming children, young couples hanging off of each other as they browsed from shop to shop, elderly couples holding hands sweetly as they walked slowly down the sidewalk. The scene was like something taken directly from one of the cheesy romantic comedies that Emma liked to watch when she was upset. The only issue was Killian, who seemed to be making it his own personal goal to glare at everyone and everything they passed on the street.

"What's gotten into you today, Killian?" Emma asked. She came to a stop in the middle of the sidewalk and grabbed his hand so that he wouldn't just ignore her and walk away. "Why are you acting like someone took the secret bottle of rum that you have stashed from your apartment and dumped it on the street?"

Killian shook his head and scoffed before pulling his hand away from hers and storming into the nearest boutique, the tails of his coat catching in the slight breeze of the day.

Emma was hurt; Killian had never treated her like this and she had no idea what she did to deserve it. Still, she pressed on and followed Killian, grabbing his hand once more when she finally caught up to him. "If you didn't want to do this today, why did you come?"

"Because you need a bloody dress," he snapped, not meeting her eyes.

Emma dropped his hand as if he had burned her. "I don't know what got into you today, but I'm _not_ doing this with you. Call me when you pull the stick out of your ass," she said, turning from him and walking away.

She had caught a glimpse of the way his face fell when she had turned away, but she refused to open herself up to more hurt and face him again. Even with him calling after her, she kept walking – out of the store, and what felt like out of his life.

"Bloody _buggering fuck!_ " Killian exclaimed, drawing the attention of the other patrons in the shop. "Sorry."

He ran his hands through his hair and contemplated running after Emma, but he knew that she would not want to see him after the way he acted. _Why_ had he let Liam get to him like this? His brother had planted that little seed of doubt in his mind about Emma, and in turn, he had treated her just like every other man in her life had treated her – with disrespect and almost cruelty. There had to be a way that he could make it up to her.

He pulled his phone from his pocket and immediately dialed her number, holding the device to his ear while walking out of the building to hail a cab.

"Come on, Swan," he muttered. "Please pick up the phone."

It went to voicemail and he swore again. He hit redial, only to come to the same result, and it was then that he broke down. He fell onto the nearest bench and dropped his head into his hands. Tears fell from his eyes, and he couldn't stop his shoulders from shaking, the weight of what had just happened weighing on him heavily.

" _What did I do?_ " Killian asked himself. "What _on earth_ did I just do?"

 ***** December 22** **nd** *******

A quiet knocking on the door woke Emma from her fitful slumber, a headache pounding behind her temples. She groaned; after leaving Killian at the boutique the day before, she had taken Henry to her parents' house and dropped him off so that David could have some time with his grandson. Without a word about what was wrong, she said goodbye to her son and parents and had gone directly home, proceeding to drink herself into a stupor while eating Chunky Monkey and watching movies that she knew had a happy ending for the heroine. She had shut her phone off halfway through the night, effectively ignoring any call or text message that Killian had sent her.

The knocking at her bedroom door sounded again, this time a bit louder, and she groaned.

"Killian, if that's you _I swear to God I will kick your ass_ ," she threatened, not bothering to move from her mountain of bedclothes. She was too comfortable, and she wanted the extra layer of protection that her mound of blankets provided for her.

"Not Killian, sweetheart," Mary Margaret said softly as she pushed open the door.

"Where's Henry?" Emma asked, avoiding the concern written all over her mother's face.

"David decided that they needed to go and get pizza and see a hockey game." Mary Margaret hovered by the door, not wanting to come further in until she had Emma's permission. "Do you want to tell me what's bothering you?"

Tears welled in Emma's eyes and she hurriedly wiped them away. "Mom," she said sadly, avoiding the topic with her lower lip quivering.

Without hesitation, Mary Margaret walked over to the bed and curled into her daughter's side, smoothing the hair out of her face with a gentle touch. "What happened, baby?" she asked, turning Emma's face to hers. Emma tucked herself into her mother's comforting hold, and Mary Margaret rubbed small circles on her lower back as she tried to calm herself down.

"You know, Emma," her mother began, "I never thought that I would get my happy ending, especially not when your father and I lost our house because of Regina. When she pulled the deed to the house and it somehow had _her_ name on it, I knew there was no way that we could raise you in the life that we wanted for you. We couldn't raise you when we were as close to homeless as we could be, and giving you up to foster care was the hardest thing we have ever done.

"I know that you found a home with the Swans, and I could never repay them for raising you to be the kind, beautiful woman that you are today." Mary Margaret had a sad smile on her face when she reached out to run her hand through her daughter's hair. "And I am _so glad_ that you came and found us. I thought I would never get to see your face again, Emma, but you _found_ us. Baby, you can do anything you set your mind to. You just have to have hope, which is one of the hardest things you have to do in your life."

"Mama, you know I don't blame you for leaving me, right?" Emma asked softly. She dried the tear tracks on her face. "The Swans always told me who I was and where I came from; they just gave me their name because they love me as much as you do. It could have been way worse, mom. I could have never found the Swans, but I did. They could have given me back to the system when they had their own child, but they didn't. You could have turned me away when I found you again, but you didn't."

"I lost my heart that day we took you to the fostering agency, did you know that?" Mary Margaret finally smiled brightly. "And I had it returned to me the day you showed up on our doorstep telling us that you were our beloved daughter."

"It was one of the best days of my life," Emma admitted. "Though Henry and I should make a trip to visit the Swans soon. They were a big part of my life, and they deserve to know Henry as much as you do."

"We'll support you in whatever you want to do, Emma." Mary Margaret settled back into the comfort of Emma's bed, Emma safely in the circle of her arms, and waited for her daughter to open up about what was bothering her.

Emma stayed curled up in her mother's arms for a long time before she finally decided to open up about what happened.

"Yesterday, Killian and I were supposed to go dress shopping," she started.

"I take it that it's not a dress for one of those skips you trail?" Mary Margaret said teasingly.

"No, mom," Emma said with a laugh. "Killian's ex Milah is getting married and I offered to go with him so that he wouldn't drink away his misery."

"Oh, Emma," Mary Margaret sighed, understanding immediately. "He doesn't know, does he?"

Emma shook her head, burying her face in her hands. "He'll never know, now."

"What happened?"

"When we were out shopping yesterday, something was off with Killian." Emma ran her hands through her already messy hair and sarcastically laughed. "I called him out on being an asshole and he snapped at me. It's not like this is the first time I've called him an ass, mom. That's part of our friendship – we always tell each other when we're not being fair to the other one. I have no idea what I did to make him so angry!"

"Emma, if I know anything about Killian, you're not the one who made him mad," Mary Margaret said with a roll of her eyes. "Now, did you ask him what was wrong?"

Emma scoffed and glared pointedly at her mother, waiting for her to catch up.

"Okay, stupid question," Mary Margaret conceded. "What happened then?"

"I told him to call me when he got the stick out of his ass and left," Emma said bluntly. "Mama, I don't know what to do."

"Has he called you?"

Emma coughed to hide part of her embarrassment. "Well, I kind of shut my phone off after the first six times he called me…"

Mary Margaret sighed before pulling herself and her daughter out of the bed. "Okay, so I want you to get in the shower and be presentable; we're going to go out and get you that dress, and you are going to know Killian's socks off at that wedding."

 _Okay, so I just wanted to point out something that people were confused about the first time that I wrote this: You can still have living family AND be adopted. I have been around two different examples of this, actually._

 _My dad's best friend (whom I have always called Uncle Kevin) adopted his daughters after fostering them, and had to fight a huge battle in the courts because their grandparents decided (after my uncle had already been in the process of adopting his daughters) that they didn't want the girls to be in a different family. He grandparents were not in a good situation to take care of the girls, which is why my uncle won that court battle._

 _The other example I've seen is something that I just recently watched happen through my work. One of my preschoolers had been living in the care of her paternal grandparents because her parents were unfit. Her father had limited visitation rights, and there was no contact whatsoever from her mother. Well, the grandparents here wanted to give my preschooler her best chance in the world, and the way to do that was for them to adopt her. They finally got full custody of her a few months ago, and they never have to worry about the birth mother deciding that she's "fit to be a parent" and coming to take this little girl away._

 _I tried to explain Mary Margaret and David's situation a little bit better this time around so you could see why they gave up custody of Emma. I hope it works._


	4. December 25

***** December 25** **th** *******

It was Christmas morning, and Emma was sitting on her couch with Henry, mugs of hot chocolate in hand and Elvis playing softly in the background. It was a Christmas tradition – they passed presents to each other, making sure everyone had one present before the paper was torn off, and laughed about Henry's impatience to open everything under the tree _right then_. There was snow falling gently outside, and it made the living room seem cozier. The smell of French toast casserole and bacon wafted in from the kitchen, and Emma took a drink from her hot chocolate to tide her over until breakfast was ready.

The only thing missing was Killian acting as Santa.

It had been four days since their fight, and Emma knew that Henry could tell something was wrong. There was a thick tension every time Emma's phone buzzed and she ignored it, usually falling silent instead of engaging in conversation with her son. She had even asked Henry to make a phone call to Killian and tell him that they were going to the Swans' for Christmas this year and for him not to come over on Christmas morning, as was their tradition. Henry was disappointed in her, she was sure, but she didn't know how to make things up with Killian. Sure, she could stop avoiding his calls and text messages, but that wouldn't erase how hurt she felt when he snapped at her. She could let him come over for their traditional Christmas morning, but she didn't want to fight with him in front of Henry.

Emma shook her head, trying to rid herself of thoughts of Killian – she didn't want to ruin her morning with her son.

"Mom, this one's from Aunt Ruby," Henry said as he passed her a thin, rectangular box.

"I think I'll open this one later, kid," she said with a laugh. "I'm guessing that Aunt Ruby didn't intend for this to be opened in front of young eyes."

Henry rolled said eyes as he reached for his hot chocolate. "I'm thirteen, mom, not -"

He was cut off by a soft knock on the door. Henry raised his eyebrows at Emma, who shrugged, and he got up to see who was over so early. Though she couldn't hear her son's conversation with their guest, she had a bad feeling that Killian had ignored her lie and come over.

"Merry Christmas, Swan," she heard Killian say softly from behind her.

She turned around and forced a smile on her face, meeting his gaze. It was hard to stay upset with him when he was looking at her with eager puppy dog eyes, but she wasn't quite ready to just drop everything and jump into his arms with glee. She had more pride than that, and felt her walls shoot up before she replied, "Merry Christmas, Jones."

A grimace flashed across Killian's face, followed by a shrug of understanding that didn't go unnoticed by Emma or Henry. The three waited in the awkward silence for a few minutes before Killian broke Emma's stare by reaching into the large cloth bag he was carrying.

"I hope you don't mind," he spoke slowly, as if he was approaching a pack of wolves instead of his best friend and her son, "but I brought-"

Henry's eyes went wide with joy. "Presents? Killian, be Santa, please?" He didn't give Killian any time to answer; instead he pulled Killian to the spot on the floor in front of the tree that had been Killian's designated "Santa spot" for almost seven years now.

Killian laughed and flopped onto the floor, sprawling his legs in front of him and opening the bag to pull out packages. A large, square box was pulled out, wrapped in Avengers themed wrapping paper, and Killian handed it to Henry. "This one's yours, lad," he said with a grin.

Henry ignored tradition and ripped open the paper to reveal a LEGO pirate ship set. "Killian, this is awesome! Thank you so much!"

A real grin finally found its way onto Emma's face. She loved seeing her son so happy. Without even thinking about it, she caught Killian's eye and saw him smiling shyly at her. Emma quickly broke his gaze to look at Henry tearing open the LEGO box, but could still feel Killian's eyes on her. She knew that they needed to talk, preferably sooner rather than later, and wasn't looking forward to the awkward conversation. How would she even begin? She couldn't just come out and tell Killian that she loved him; they had been through too much over the course of their friendship, and he had really hurt her with his comments the last time they were together.

 _Best just to grin and bear it,_ Emma thought.

"Hey kid, why don't you take your LEGOs into your room so that you don't have to carry the completed pirate ship in there when you're done?" She was evading, that was clear. "Also, I need a few minutes to talk to Killian, if you don't mind playing in there until breakfast is ready."

Henry nodded and grabbed his half-opened LEGO box, stopping briefly in the kitchen before heading to his bedroom.

"If you took more than three cookies before breakfast, Henry Swan, I swear I will take video games away for the rest of the day!" Emma yelled after him, rolling her eyes when all she heard was laughter.

She heard Killian clear his throat from his spot on the floor and turned to see him gazing up at her through those thick eyelashes with sad, puppy dog eyes. Damn him – he knew how much that got to her and how she could never really say no to them.

"Hey," he said softly.

"Hey," she gave him a small smile and allowed her heart to open back up, just a bit. "Listen –"

"Swan, let me talk. Please?" he interrupted. "I was a right arse the other day and I feel terrible about it. I have no excuse to give other than a painful talk with Liam earlier in the day that set me on edge. I shouldn't have taken it out on you, but I did, and I feel terrible about it. Do you think you could forgive me?"

She could tell that he really did feel terrible about what had happened; there was no mistaking the pain and longing that laced his tone, and the way he stared into her eyes with the most hopeful expression she had ever seen just reinforced that fact. Emma smiled slightly and got up from her place on the couch and went to sit next to Killian, taking his left hand and grasping it firmly between both of hers.

"The day I don't forgive you, Killian Jones, is the day that I am dead and buried."

"Hopefully that won't be for a very long time," he teased. He ran his free thumb over her knuckles lightly – just enough to soothe any lingering pain that she was feeling. "Thank you, love. I didn't mean to hurt you. I bloody well feel awful about it."

Emma brushed it off with a shake of her head and a smile. "Don't feel bad any more, Killian. It's over, and we've moved past it, okay? Besides, you being an ass got you out of dress shopping with me for good." He looked confused and was about to speak when Emma pulled on of her hands from his and held it up. "Mom came over to make sure I was okay the day after our fight, and after talking it out a bit, she almost forced me in to dress shopping with her so that I could get my mind off of it. I have the dress I'm wearing for the wedding hanging in my closet now."

Killian just smiled and pulled his hand from hers, moving to dig through his Santa bag. "I take it that I won't get to see this dress until the wedding?" he paused and waited for Emma to shake her head. "Well, in that case, how about I give you your Christmas present?"

Emma grinned and wiggled like a small child in her place next to Killian. "Yes, please!" she said excitedly.

He passed her a small box, wrapped neatly in gold and silver paper that didn't last more than thirty seconds before it was ripped to shreds by Emma's fingers.

"Oh," she said softly as she opened the jewelry box to reveal three thin, silver bangles. They were those bracelets that you bought to stack – Alex and Ani – and he found her three different charms that spoke of her and their friendship. The first was an anchor that was made to look like it was wrapped in rope, clearly representing the times that they had spent on the water with Henry and Liam – simply sailing the day away. The next was a swan that was hanging gracefully from the bracelet, a nod to her upbringing. The final one she wasn't completely sure of the meaning – it looked like the face of a compass, but instead of a needle pointing in one direction, it had all of the directions noted with a heart sitting in the center. "Killian, these are beautiful. Thank you so much."

He grabbed her left wrist and pulled it towards him, gesturing for the box that the bracelets came in. He took the box from her and gently slid the three bangles over her wrist, leaving the compass one for last and letting his gaze linger on it as he placed it with the others.

"Merry Christmas, Emma," he said quietly.

"Merry Christmas, Killian," she said. She caught herself leaning towards him, almost imperceptibly, and heard his soft intake of breath. They were so close; she could almost feel her heart ready to beat out of her chest, and knew that his was responding the same way.

Then, the timer on the oven went off, effectively breaking the spell they were under and letting them know that breakfast was ready.

Emma sighed and pulled herself from Killian's side, as hard as it was to do so, to get up and pull their breakfast from the oven.

"Will you stay?" she asked, turning back to glance at him still in front of the tree. He smiled and nodded, and she grinned in response. "Good. Please let Henry know that breakfast is ready?"

She walked away without waiting for a response, with one thing in her mind: _man, I am so screwed._

 _Do you guys want to hear the definition of irony? Well, I am in my 4_ _th_ _year of college as an English major with a plan to go into editing and publishing as my future career. Going through this makes me realize just how much I HATE editing my own work. Maybe it's because it's mine and I'll be disappointed in it no matter what, or maybe it's just the fact that it's tedious and I know that I should be writing 4 papers that are due within the next two weeks, but it was a pain in the ass to get through editing this chapter. I wanted to give you guys new material, but I wanted to keep the main concepts the same and oh my god I just couldn't get any of the paragraphs to work the way I wanted them to._

 _Anyway, you don't want to hear me rambling about this. The next chapter will be the last section from the original story, and then I plan on deviating and expanding so that you guys have something completely new to go with the rewrite. After the edited chapters are done, I will be a little bit slower to update. I am apologizing in advanced._

 _Again, thank you guys so much for reading and I hope that you enjoyed this chapter!_


	5. March 8

***** March 8** **th** *******

The months after Christmas flew by and Emma found herself falling more in love with her best friend. After their fight, he had tried so hard to make it up to her, even after she had already forgiven him. It was almost like he couldn't forgive himself, but wasn't going to stop trying.

Emma was thrilled with all of the extra attention that Killian was showering her and Henry with, however. He was over at her apartment more than he was at his own: on the nights she had to work late, he picked up Henry from school and made sure that he did his homework and got something healthy for dinner; Saturday and Sunday mornings, Killian was in Emma's kitchen cooking breakfast for all three of them; he volunteered to help out when Henry went on a field trip because he knew that Emma was busy and couldn't always make it.

Killian was acting like Henry's father and Emma's husband, and it made Emma's heart fell full – she had never had this, her _son_ had never had this, and Killian was making all of her dreams come true. Her life was sweet and domestic now, and it was scaring Emma how much she loved him.

Emma loved Killian with all of her heart and soul, and she could only hope that he felt the same for her.

Emma had dropped off Henry at her parents early that morning, promising him that she would take him to get ice cream the next day if he got all of his homework done and was good for Mary Margaret and David. Ruby, Elsa, and Belle were coming over at one thirty to help her get ready for the night; it was about ten when she had gotten back from the suburbs of Boston, so she decided to shower and do her nails while she waited for her girls. Killian had promised her that he would be there to pick her up at four thirty on the dot, and she wanted to look absolutely perfect when he showed up at her door.

Her girls showed up early – Elsa was there by noon, cooking a grilled cheese because she knew that Emma wouldn't have eaten anything yet due to her nervousness about the night; Belle was there by twelve thirty, plugging in her curling iron and organizing her hair supplies on Emma's vanity; Ruby showed up at twelve forty-five, arms laden down with her makeup kit and various accessories for Emma to try on. After Elsa had forced the sandwich down Emma's throat, Belle sat her down in front of her vanity in her swirly office chair, curling iron held aloft and a grin on her face.

Since she had showered and washed her hair after she got home from dropping Henry off, it was already dry – this was a good thing for Belle, because it usually took Emma a half an hour to dry… on a good day. Belle was patient and took her time curling, pinning, and spraying Emma's long blonde hair into a braided, unmovable updo that was fit for a princess headed for her first royal ball.

Ruby let Emma get up and stretch for a couple of minutes before she had to sit back down for makeup; Emma pulled her dress out of the garment bag and handed it to Elsa so that she could make sure it was perfect before Emma put it on. When Emma sat back down in the chair, Ruby had an almost feral look on her face as she held the eyeliner pencil in front of Emma's face. Emma knew that she would look stunning when Ruby was done, but also knew that it was going to be a painful half hour while Ruby worked her magic.

It was three forty five by the time Emma was able to get out of the chair and into her dress. The emerald mermaid dress fit her like a glove, and Emma felt like a rock star once Elsa had helped her into it. They still had time to spare before Killian arrived, so Emma broke out a bottle of Kendall Jackson Sauvignon Blanc and four wine glasses. Elsa took this this opportunity to talk Emma into telling Killian how she felt about him.

"I don't know why you're being so stubborn," Elsa said, taking a sip of her wine.

"I don't know," Emma said sarcastically, "maybe it's because he's my best friend and telling him that I'm in love with him could ruin our relationship forever?"

Elsa rolled her eyes and Ruby snorted.

"You know that boy's in love with you, right?" Ruby asked, laughing. "I don't understand how you don't see it."

Belle nodded, taking a drink. "She's right, Emma. About Killian being in love with you? You can see it in his face any time you do _anything_. Killian practically glows with admiration any time he's within ten feet of you."

"Do you really think so?" Emma asked. She took a drink of her wine to cover how nervous she was actually feeling, but she could tell that the girls didn't buy it. "I can't risk being wrong about this, guys. There's too much on the line here."

There was a knock on the door before Elsa could respond, and Emma quickly downed the last of her wine. The time flew; apparently it was four thirty already. Ruby and Belle went to Emma's side to make sure that not a hair or eyelash was out of place while Elsa went to open the door. As she smoothed out her dress one last time, Killian walked into the kitchen with Elsa at his side. Emma's eyes were immediately drawn to the clean lines of Killian in his tuxedo – she was so screwed.

"Wow, Swan," he said, his jaw dropping slightly. "I mean, Emma, you look absolutely stunning tonight."

She grinned. Mary Margaret had spent hours helping Emma find the perfect dress, and the end result was something that she knew her mother would be proud of; a strapless, mermaid style dress in an emerald green with a bejeweled bodice that was set off with Emma's carefully styled updo and subtle smoky eye, paired with the silver bangles that Killian had given her for Christmas made her look like a princess. Mary Margaret must have told Killian what color she was wearing; the black of his tuxedo was set off with an emerald waistcoat and tie.

Killian took a deep breath as he looked her up and down – Emma caught Ruby's eyebrow waggle and rolled her eyes – before offering his arm to her.

"Shall we, my lady?" he asked with a shy smile.

"We shall, good sir," she teased as she gently placed her hand in the crook of his arm. As they walked out of the apartment, Emma turned slightly to face her friends and gave them a grateful smile, mouthing "thank you".

They walked in a companionable silence to Killian's car. Emma refused to take her hand from the comfort of his arm, but it was cold outside, which made her shiver. He noticed, of course he did, and took off his tuxedo jacket and draped it over her shoulders. The gesture was something that warmed Emma to the very core; the small, private smile that she shared with Killian when he wrapped his jacket around her made her palms sweaty and her heart rate increase. She knew that her friends were right – she needed to tell Killian how she felt tonight – but she didn't think that this moment was the opportunity to do so.

They reached the car, and Emma let Killian help her in. She smiled sweetly and ran her fingers up his forearm. The confused look on Killian's face made her smile widen, and she settled back into her seat for the ride to the wedding.

Even Emma had to admit that the wedding ceremony was stunning. Everything was perfectly planned and went off without a hitch. There wasn't a hair out of place or a dried flower bud in sight, and Emma longed for a bit of chaos. Or alcohol. Whichever came first to liven the place up a bit. She hated to be the new girlfriend who was jealous of an old girlfriend, because she wasn't Killian's girlfriend, but there was something about being here with him that made her immensely angry at Milah.

While she was glad that things didn't work out between the two of them, Emma could only see this wedding as something that Killian should have had with Milah, something that Milah abandoned when she dumped Killian. In Emma's eyes, it wasn't fair that Milah got her happy ending so soon after breaking Killian's heart.

Emma sighed and settled into the seat that Killian was holding out for her. There was a delicate white place card at her seat with an elegant gold script that said _"Emma Swan"_ , and a glass of champagne sitting behind the place card. Emma unfolded the napkin that was lying on top of her plate and placed it across her lap before turning to smile at Killian.

"Halfway through, Emma." Killian sighed and ran his hands through his hair before relaxing back into his seat and picking up his champagne glass. He took a sip of the bubbly wine and grimaced. "If we can get through the rest of tonight, I will never have to deal with this bloody woman again."

Emma placed her hand on top of the one Killian had resting on top of the table, stroking her fingers lightly over each bump and ridge along the top of his hand. "You know that we didn't have to come tonight, right?"

Killian flipped his hand up and laced his fingers through Emma's, squeezing lightly. "And you know why I had to." He paused for a moment, thinking back to the wedding ceremony. "Not that I saw my brother, the ponce. Something tells me that he did this on purpose so that I would have to face my past."

"Why would Liam do that to you?" Emma rolled her eyes. "He's your brother."

"Exactly. _He's my brother._ "

"Anyway, we're already halfway through. As you said, all we have to do now is get through the reception, and then we can go home.

Killian's mouth quirked up in a smile and he squeezed her hand once more before letting go. "Thank you again for doing this for me, love. I don't know that I would have been able to get through the night if I didn't have you here with me."

"You know that I'm always here for you, Killian," she said softly. "You're my best friend, and you're the best thing that's ever happened to me. I wouldn't let you go through this without me."

Killian's response was cut off; the deejay announced that the bridal party was making their entrance – he introduced every member of the party to the theme song from Friends – and finally, the bride and groom made their big entrance. The food was eaten shortly after, and the speeches were made. Milah teared up at the speech from her matron of honor, and everyone in the reception hall laughed when the best man embarrassed the groom. The cake was then cut, the first dance as bride and groom played, the bouquet was thrown – Emma was not one of the desperate women fighting over the bouquet, thank you very much – and the garter was caught. The evening had passed quickly, much to the relief of Emma and Killian.

The evening was quieting down and the guests at the reception hall were thinning out when the opening chords of Elvis' _Can't Help Falling in Love (With You)_ filled the reception hall. Emma smiled when Killian caught her eyes and grabbed her hand, pulling her to the floor to dance.

"I know you love this song, Swan," he teased. "And I also know that you hate dancing. But will you do me the honor of dancing with me?"

"I don't hate dancing," she countered. It earned her a raised eyebrow. "I only hate dancing when I'm not with a partner who knows what he's doing."

Killian's smile softened and he spun her around the dance floor. Emma felt warm in his arms and she knew that this is where she was meant to be. Here, in Killian's arms, she felt at home; he was great with Henry, they had been friends for most of her adult life, he was on good terms with her parents… Emma really wasn't sure what had held her back from telling him how she felt for so long, but she knew that it had to be done tonight.

"Killian, I have to tell you something." She worried her lip before looking him in the eye, only to find him shaking his head at her.

"I think I need to say something first, Emma," he interrupted. "Something that I've been holding back for months now because I was too afraid to ruin what we have together. I'm in love with you, Emma Swan. I can't tell you exactly when I realized that I was in love with you, but I do know that the feeling has been there for almost as long as I can remember. I don't know why I haven't told you before now – maybe it was because of how Milah left me, or maybe it was because of how you were treated in past relationships – but I do know that not another day can go by with you not knowing what you mean to me. When I let you walk away from me that day in the boutique, my heart stopped. I thought I had lost everything that I could have ever wanted in the world. It made me realize, however, that I never want to go another day without seeing your smile or buffering arguments between you and Henry when he's eaten too much sugar. I am so in love with you, Emma Swan, that it hurts. I don't know what I would do without you."

Emma's eyes were watering before he could even get his explanation out – he loved her like she loved him! She felt her heart growing fuller as he poured his heart out to her, and by the time he finished, she was too choked up to say anything. Instead, she did the next best thing.

She kissed him.

Their lips' meeting was like the connection of two live wires. Their connection was something that Emma had never felt before, and she knew that she would never get enough of this man. They pulled away from each other as the song's final chords played over the speakers, resting their foreheads against one another's. Emma was reluctant to pull away from his lips completely, even though she knew that this wasn't the end of their story.

"I love you too, Killian Jones," Emma whispered. "I think I have from the moment I met you. You have been there for the highs and the lows in my life, and you are the best thing that has ever happened to me and my son. I don't know what I would do without you either. All I know is that if this were entirely up to me, not a day would go by without you at my side."

He captured her lips with his once more, and Emma knew that he felt exactly the same way she did.

There was a small thrill in her when Emma realized that Ruby might have been right about sheets getting ruined; she was not letting Killian go home alone tonight.

 _I cannot tell you how sorry I am for how late this update is. I had some stuff come up in life which made me really overwhelmed, and I did not have the time to even consider writing fanfiction. So I will apologize until the next chapter is up, because I didn't want to leave you guys hanging this long._

 _I have attached a link to what I used as inspiration for Emma's gown. As always, drop me a review if you enjoyed this or were confused by any part of it!_

shop/viewitem-PD1326087


	6. March 9

_Well. I don't think there are words for what has happened since I last updated this fic. I wish that I could try and explain, but I have no way to explain the mental struggle I have been dealing with. I feel terrible that I have let all of my writing go for so long, but I'm working through some issues and I hope that my updates start to come quicker._

 _On the upside, I am in the home stretch of my Bachelor's degree in English (focused in Literature Studies). This just means that my schooling is going to become more paper-intensive, which means that you all will get updates when I want to put off scholarly writing and editing._

 _Again, I am so sorry that this has taken me so long, especially for how short it is. As always, if you liked what I wrote, please respond! Oh, this chapter is bringing this fic up to a more mature rating. I hope I succeeded in that._

 _Chapter Track: End of the Line by the Traveling Wilburys_

 ***March 9***

Emma woke up slowly, feeling pleasantly sore as she stretched her usual kinks from her back. There was an ache between her thighs that she hadn't felt in a long time, and she could feel the cause nestled against her ass. Emma smiled, a coy little thing that she was glad Killian couldn't see, and pressed herself backwards into Killian's arousal. There was a low groan from behind her before a pair of strong arms came up and wrapped around her waist tightly.

"I don't think you know what you're doing right now, love," Killian said, a low growl sounding in her ear. His tongue traced the shell of her earlobe when he was done speaking, causing a shiver to run down Emma's spine; an excuse to nestle closer into his arms.

She can feel every ridge of his hard body; his muscles were well defined from years of hard works and athleticism, and she could feel his arousal growing with every slight movement of her hips. She had never felt this kind of connection in the aftermath of sex. Maybe it had to do with _who_ she was having sex with, but last night was one of the best nights of her life, and she was anxious to experience it again.

"What if I told you that I did know _exactly_ what I was doing?" she whispered back. It was hard with his rock-solid grip on her, but she managed to flip over in his arms and press a lingering kiss to his lips. "Morning, tiger."

He didn't reply. Instead, he pressed his mouth to hers once more and deepened the kiss, running his tongue along her lips until Emma granted him entrance. It was like this the night before: passion that hasn't been fulfilled coming to a peak, tension growing until the dam finally broke and Emma got to let go of every doubt, insecurity, and bad feeling that her past relationships had left her with—all at the insistence of Killian's unrelenting tongue.

Killian's lips left Emma's and began to travel south: down her neck, pressing kisses and sucking marks over her sensitive pulse points; along her collarbone leaving small nips and burying his nose at the base of her throat; his tongue laved over her nipples, and he moaned at the slight of them puckering under his attention. The couple hadn't bothered to put anything on before falling asleep in each other's arms the night before, and Killian was reaping the benefits now. He licked, nipped, and sucked at her pert breasts causing Emma to pant, her back arching slightly. He kissed each nipple once more, tongue lingering on each taut peak, before continuing down the lines of her body.

Emma moaned loudly, her legs spreading without any conscious thought on her part. She tangled the fingers of her left hand in his hair, raking her fingernails roughly along his scalp as he kissed over her stomach. He was getting closer to the apex of her thighs, now, and he was positively _dripping_ under his ministrations. His nose dipped into her belly button as he pressed a kiss just under it; she could feel his grin against her skin and pulled him up to her lips, kissing him roughly. Her left hand stayed where it was tangled in his hand, but her right traced down the hard planes of his body to where he wanted her touch most. His arousal was long, thick, and hot, and he moaned when her small hand wrapped around his length. Emma ran her thumb over the head, dragging it slowly through the evidence of his arousal that had gathered on the tip.

"I love you," he said in a low voice, his lips never leaving hers.

"Not as much as I love you." Emma's legs spread wider, and she used the hand she had wrapped around Killian to guide him to her dripping entrance. "Make love to me, Killian," she demanded with a sigh against his lips.

He kissed her passionately as he slid home with one solid thrust, and her back arched, her breasts pressing up into her chest. Her hips rolled steadily up into his as he thrust within her tight sheath, their breath coming rougher. Killian's hand came up from where it was resting on her waist to her breast, his thumb tweaking her nipple. Emma moaned and bit down on where Killian's shoulder met the base of his neck, dragging her teeth along the taut skin there. With each press of his cock inside her came a rough moan—sometimes from Emma, sometimes from Killian—and Emma scarcely knew where she ended and he began, she was taking him so deep within her.

Killian's hand that wasn't playing with Emma's breasts landed where their bodies met, his thumb rubbing small circles over her clit and the sensation built within her, causing gradual waves of pleasure to ride over her body. She felt herself clench around Killian as the waves of pleasure finally broke around her, drowning her in oblivion. She cried out as her orgasm brought her pleasure and dug her nails into the thickness of Killian's hair, her other hand raking down his back.

His thrusts became erratic as he chased his pleasure; he continued to pump into her as his peak found him and he emptied himself inside her walls. His thrusts slowed and eventually stopped, his arms collapsing from under his weight as he fell to her side. Killian pressed a soft kiss to her forehead and brought her in close, both of them sated to the point of exhaustion.

As they lay silently together, Emma let her fingers caress Killian's back and smiled.

"Good morning, lass," he said, dropping a kiss to her reddened lips.

"Good morning, tiger."

The sun was high in the sky when Emma finally woke again. She stretched, a moan of satisfaction breaking free from her lips. She reached over to the side of the bed that Killian had been sleeping on only to find it empty. Confused, she sat up and looked around the room, only to find that it was empty as well. He couldn't have left her, could he?

Emma threw back the covers as the door to her bedroom opened, Killian standing under the frame with a tray of food in his hands. Emma felt foolish thinking him to have left her, especially when she knew that he loved her as she loved him. His bright smile lit up the room, and she felt herself flush under his gaze.

"I thought you'd left," she admitted softly, pulling the comforter back down over her most intimate parts: once more they had gone without clothes, and his eyes upon her were making her feel shy, though she knew there was no real reason for it.

"Never again, Emma," he said softly. "For as long as you want me, I will be here."


End file.
